The new year is a curious thing. Many times it has slipped by me as little more than a marker that the return to school is that much closer. Or a reminder that taxes need to be done.
2013 is different.
Starting a new calendar year feels like the long-awaited trigger I’ve been caressing for longer than I’d care to admit (and please, excuse the gun metaphor in this current climate). Last year I made resolutions. And that worked out really well for me.
This year I’m making changes.
Not in the permanent, forever, everything is different for always way. But in the awkward yet exciting developing a new habit and you’re not sure where it’s going to take you or how it’s going to feel way.
I posted the following quote/image on Facebook:
Then I declared I was taking a break from it. I deactivated my Twitter account. I deleted all my social media-ish iPhone and iPad apps (except Instagram, though we will see if that lasts). I disabled all notifications. I logged out of my various computers.
I wasn’t too sure what to do with myself.
A day or so later, I feel free. I feel light. I feel in the dark (information is out there! and I don’t know! oh no!). I feel weird. But I feel okay.
Maybe it’s odd to blog in the midst of a social media fast–per se. This feels very different to me. This is intentional. Cathartic and productive. Facebook (and to a lesser degree Twitter) was a time suck. It held my energy and feelings hostage all too often. It was automatic in a way that I can’t really even describe.
Other changes in the new year include: another Whole30-type detox-ish program-like thing, methodically working through organizing my house, marking my mileage reimbursement by my odometer, and carrying a book with me.
It’s a new year and I am ready to feel my best, even if there’s sacrifice in finding out what that is–and how one gets there. Also? As of January 1 my family has health insurance! Together, for the first time ever. So I’m looking forward to taking advantage of that.
I hope there is more to come on this month. But if I’ve learned anything through the last year or so, it’s that I can’t anticipate my time or motivation for this particular endeavor. There’s just not much extra of that to go around 🙂